What i really feel i cannot say. What i cannot say i really feel. Its a vicious cycle. I want to say it. I want to say it here. I want to open up here so i dont have to elsewhere. A word doc is not enough because it doesnt sometimes post comments to let me know it will all be okay or that i am loved.

"Feel these four walls closing in
Face up against the glass
i'm looking out mmmm
"Is this my life?"
I'm wondering
it happened so fast
how do i turn this thing around?"

I do finally regret something in my life. Normally i try not to because of the simple fact that it makes me who i am today. God, I'm crying. Why? Because i dont like what I am thinking about. It makes me sad and hurt inside. I doesnt help that i cant talk to anyone. I sit alone in my room crying alone. The grandest part of it is it is my own fault.

Oh for those who are looking, i did delete my myspace. It makes me angry to go into it. Thats a whole different story for a different day.